Cynthia (csakuras) wrote,

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Somewhat random, but

I just realized that I tend to like pairings that involve a responsible, mature, intelligent guy and a "bad" girl who hates "normal" people. In my Pokemon fanfic, "The Dungeon," I was leading up to a pairing like this (Trey, the responsible Gym Leader x Shade, the creepy, antisocial, mischevious Dark-type trainer), and in my Nelly story, I've begun planning for Dzader/Julie to eventually happen. Dzader/Julie wasn't even in my original plans, but it just came to me suddenly when I was writing Chapter 4. It was like "Hey...this could get really interesting a few books from now."

Maybe it's because I know that my Detective Conan OTP (Conan/Haibara) will never be canon, and I'm trying to compensate subconsciously?

I guess the appeal to me is how the guy gets to be interested in the girl when she's such an odd person, and how the girl gets to be interested in the guy when she usually doesn't like people like him. It allows me to create quirks in the characters and how their personalities clash is pretty fun. It usually involves a lot of snarky banter.

The reason I'm thinking about this now is because last night I had a dream about a similar pairing. It played out like a story, like a lot of my dreams. It was about a girl in high school who was training to be a witch (she went to an after school club with some older occult fanatics), and a straight-A, popular and good-looking guy. He likes to hang out with her a lot, though she's kind of an outcast, and even walks her home sometimes. The girl gets really annoyed by this, because she thinks he's some perfect pretty boy who wants to make her miserable, but doesn't show it. She desperately wants to think of some way to curse him so he could leave her alone.

At her occult club, she tells her problem to her elders, and explains that she can't think of a way to get back at him. The older witches, hearing of this, realize that the guy is actually in love with her. The girl is very surprised by this. The witches suggest that she take advantage of his crush, because in their words, "his only weakness is you."

She's very hesitant about this at first, but eventually manages to be alone with him (which isn't that hard to do because he follows her around everywhere), and she does take advantage of it. And behold, he confesses that he likes her. This makes her feel somewhat guilty, but she's already gone so far. She eventually starts telling people that the guy raped her. Some people don't believe her, because he really is a decent guy, but some people, who noticed that he was kinda stalking her, do believe the rumor, and his reputation is ruined.

The guy is, naturally, very hurt by this. He comes by her house to ask about the rumor, and the girl is frustrated. "Don't you get it?" she screams, "I hate you! That's why! All of it was a lie! Now why don't you just leave me alone!" The guy doesn't react to this, he just stares at her in shock, looking pale. The girl goes back into her house and slams the door in his face. She realizes that she's crying, and when she looks out the window, she sees him still standing there. She screams at him to leave, and her curses seem to work, because he finally turns around and leaves.

They stop talking after that. He doesn't follow her around anymore. The girl finds that she doesn't feel triumphant at all, and instead horribly guilty. She realizes that he really didn't deserve any of that at all. On top of that, she'd started to like him back while manipulating him, and now misses his close presence and his chatting about mundane things. Of course, now she's completely ruined any chances with him, or so she thinks.

The witches at her club congratulate her. She doesn't feel like telling them what a horrible idea she thinks it was, and instead stops going to the club.

One day, they pass each other in the hall. There is an awkward silence, but when they brush past each other, the guy whispers "I still love you." The girl stands there in shock, thinking "Why?!" How could he possibly still care for her, after what she did to him? Was he stupid?

After another month of stewing in guilt and depression, the girl announces to the school that she lied when she said that he'd raped her. Automatically, her reputation goes WAY down the drain, even more than before, and as for the guy, people apologize to him for believing her.

A few days later, the guy comes to her house again. The girl reluctantly comes out to meet him, and tells him she's sorry. And...gah, my memory of the dream is kinda foggy here, but I think he says that he trusted her to reveal the truth eventually. She asks him why, and again he says that it's because he still loves her. When she gapes at him incredulously, he explains that he used to think that she was perfect. Now he knows that he's wrong, and in a way he's sort of glad that this all happened, because now he knows her better, and that she does have faults. But because of that he also knew that she wasn't the kind of person to keep this lie going forever, so he trusted her.

This puts tears in her eyes, but all she can say to him is "You're really stupid." The guy shrugs and says, "I guess I am. That's one of my faults too." There's a moment of awkward silence. The guy shyly puts his hands in his pockets and turns to leave, but she grabs his sleeve and says "Where's your manners? Can't you see I'm crying here, dammit?!"

With a smile, he gives her a hug, and she continues crying into his shirt. When she's finished, she murmurs, "You fell in love with a cruel bitch."

He whispers, "I don't think so."

"How do you know I won't do the same thing again?" she asks.

"I know you won't."

"You trust me too damn much."

"No, I mean that I know you won't because no one will believe you now."

"Oh, so now you start thinking with your head."

He laughs, and it's pretty much happy fluff time after that. The girl gets bullied in school, but the guy defends her, and people think he's crazy when he starts going out with her. So they're both the oddballs in school now, until they get to college and their old reputations don't matter much anymore and they're both happier once they could leave that all behind. I'm not sure if they stay together though, because the girl gets a bit of an inferiority complex in college (it all starts with the two of them discussing what colleges to get into, and the one he suggests sounds really challenging for her, so he says he could get into the one she likes instead, and this makes her angry because she doesn't want him to "lower himself to her level", and she works her butt off to get into his college of choice). That's about where I woke up.

...And now that I've put it in writing, what an overdramatic shoujo-ish dream, omigawd. -__-; See? This is why I suck at romance.

EDIT: Also, I really hope this dream isn't telling me something about my love life, because what the girl did was still horrible, even if she was mostly succumbing to peer pressure.
Tags: dreams, fandom, shipping

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